Santa's Revenge

Last year you had, from that would-be bard,
A poem, along with your Christmas card,
Suggesting that I, good Santa, am mean;
But to tell the truth and here come clean,
I am always the jolly and jovial sort
With whom the good and gracious consort;
I am ever generous and I never repent
The endless advice and gifts I've sent;
I chuck the kiddies under the chin
And list the rewards of lying and sin;
I cheer them up with my ho-ho-ho
And tell them where bad little children go,
That being naughty will nothing bring
No matter how sweetly they pray and sing;
I hug them close and promise them just
The things they want, to be had on trust,
For each darling girl and sterling boy
The cherished doll or the chosen toy;
This year and now that the time comes near,
Be sure that I wish you nothing but cheer;
Be full of joys and enjoy the good times
You've earned despite a few petty crimes;
Though you may not be all sweet and good,
I will have it proclaimed and understood,
No has-been poet can outdo me
In wishing you as happy as you happen to be.

Santa